FUNNY Jokes, FUNNY Tubes & FUNNY Video Clips
- EmetEdadsBeard
- Top Scorer
- Posts: 1037
- Joined: 05 Sep 2010, 08:53
- Favourite player: Andy Gurney
- Location: At home with head in gas oven
I never wanted to believe it when my mate was accused of stealing from his job as a roadworker, but when I visited his house all the signs were there..........
'Never argue with an idiot, they drag you down to their level then beat you with their experience!
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- Country Captain
- Posts: 3553
- Joined: 18 Sep 2010, 17:29
- Favourite player: ROBIN STUBBS
- Location: Gloucester
I went to the cemetry last week to put some flowers on my wifes grave. I saw a group of pall bearers walking around the cemetry with a coffin on their shoulders.. some 2 hours later as I was leaving the cemetry They were still walking around with this coffin on their shoulders.
I thought. They must have lost the plot!
I thought. They must have lost the plot!
Always Look on the bright side of life
Check out my poems topic... http://www.torquayfans.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=4843
Check out my poems topic... http://www.torquayfans.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=4843
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- Country Captain
- Posts: 3553
- Joined: 18 Sep 2010, 17:29
- Favourite player: ROBIN STUBBS
- Location: Gloucester
BREAKING NEWS
A new Arab crisis was looming last night after Dubai was refused permission to air The Flintstones. A spokesman for the TV channel said last night that a claim was made that the population in Dubia would be understand the Humour. But he went on Further. We know it for a fact that People in Abu dubia Do.
A new Arab crisis was looming last night after Dubai was refused permission to air The Flintstones. A spokesman for the TV channel said last night that a claim was made that the population in Dubia would be understand the Humour. But he went on Further. We know it for a fact that People in Abu dubia Do.
Always Look on the bright side of life
Check out my poems topic... http://www.torquayfans.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=4843
Check out my poems topic... http://www.torquayfans.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=4843
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- Country Captain
- Posts: 3553
- Joined: 18 Sep 2010, 17:29
- Favourite player: ROBIN STUBBS
- Location: Gloucester
I went to my local pet shop the other day to buy a tarantula for my kids birthday. They were £130. wow that's expensive. I could get one cheaper from the Web
Always Look on the bright side of life
Check out my poems topic... http://www.torquayfans.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=4843
Check out my poems topic... http://www.torquayfans.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=4843
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- Country Captain
- Posts: 3553
- Joined: 18 Sep 2010, 17:29
- Favourite player: ROBIN STUBBS
- Location: Gloucester
I was warned by my Doctor that I should stop my bad habit of drinking brake fluid. But I told him that I could stop at any time.
Always Look on the bright side of life
Check out my poems topic... http://www.torquayfans.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=4843
Check out my poems topic... http://www.torquayfans.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=4843
- Scott Brehaut
- TorquayFans Admin
- Posts: 4556
- Joined: 05 Sep 2010, 16:04
- Favourite player: Lee Mansell
- Location: Guernsey
Manchester United and Manchester City have teamed up to release a new fragrance - it's called Channel no. 5
STIP
Friend of torquayfans.com
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- Country Captain
- Posts: 3553
- Joined: 18 Sep 2010, 17:29
- Favourite player: ROBIN STUBBS
- Location: Gloucester
??? I assume thats a reference to them both now being in the Europa league. Is it on channel 5 ? I don't watch it as a rule as Torquay isn't involved lol.
Always Look on the bright side of life
Check out my poems topic... http://www.torquayfans.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=4843
Check out my poems topic... http://www.torquayfans.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=4843
- EmetEdadsBeard
- Top Scorer
- Posts: 1037
- Joined: 05 Sep 2010, 08:53
- Favourite player: Andy Gurney
- Location: At home with head in gas oven
My mate just got back from the World Masturbating championships.
He came first and third!
He came first and third!
'Never argue with an idiot, they drag you down to their level then beat you with their experience!
- EmetEdadsBeard
- Top Scorer
- Posts: 1037
- Joined: 05 Sep 2010, 08:53
- Favourite player: Andy Gurney
- Location: At home with head in gas oven
Just got some sausages from Sainsburys with a picture of jamie Oliver on the packet.
On the back it says 'Prick with a fork'.
Can't argue with that really................... 8/
On the back it says 'Prick with a fork'.
Can't argue with that really................... 8/
'Never argue with an idiot, they drag you down to their level then beat you with their experience!
For my next trick, I shall eat a percussion instrument in a bap. Drum roll please...
- yellowmonkey
- Vice Captain
- Posts: 609
- Joined: 05 Sep 2010, 16:53
- Watches from: Pop side
"Good morning, Childline, Lucy speaking, how can I help you?"
"Alright Lucy? It's Timmy"
"Timmy! How are you? It's been a while since we last spoke"
"Not good. He's done it again"
"Oh you poor love! I thought that it had stopped?"
"I know. And to top it off, my little brother got it too"
"Oh you poor darlings! Well, listen here, you and your brother are not alone. There are many children in this situation, even on Christmas morning and this is why we're here. Now, tell me, at your own speed, what was it this time?"
"The Plymouth Argyle away kit".
"Alright Lucy? It's Timmy"
"Timmy! How are you? It's been a while since we last spoke"
"Not good. He's done it again"
"Oh you poor love! I thought that it had stopped?"
"I know. And to top it off, my little brother got it too"
"Oh you poor darlings! Well, listen here, you and your brother are not alone. There are many children in this situation, even on Christmas morning and this is why we're here. Now, tell me, at your own speed, what was it this time?"
"The Plymouth Argyle away kit".
- yellowmonkey
- Vice Captain
- Posts: 609
- Joined: 05 Sep 2010, 16:53
- Watches from: Pop side
This random woman keeps having a go at me for my 'obsession' with biblical figures.
What a weirdo. I don't even Noah.
What a weirdo. I don't even Noah.
- yellowmonkey
- Vice Captain
- Posts: 609
- Joined: 05 Sep 2010, 16:53
- Watches from: Pop side
My blonde wife just said, "When are you going to tell me how long a fortnight is?"
I said, "Two weeks."
She said, "Tell me now! I can't wait that long."
I said, "Two weeks."
She said, "Tell me now! I can't wait that long."
- yellowmonkey
- Vice Captain
- Posts: 609
- Joined: 05 Sep 2010, 16:53
- Watches from: Pop side
I've just seen the dress code for the upcoming railway enthusiasts disco...
Everyone must wear platforms.
Everyone must wear platforms.
- yellowmonkey
- Vice Captain
- Posts: 609
- Joined: 05 Sep 2010, 16:53
- Watches from: Pop side
have erectile disfunction.
I went to the doctors, and one of the the things he gave me was a wallchart, to monitor my daily patterns.
But I couldn't get it up.
I went to the doctors, and one of the the things he gave me was a wallchart, to monitor my daily patterns.
But I couldn't get it up.
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