A sobering thought, just ask Ruud van Nistlerooy. He was playing for Man Utd in a Champions League game somewhere in Eastern Europe where horses are extremely well looked after and where standards of welfare are impeccable. ( That bit is sarcasm ) 8/ so when he went in for a diving header he was quickly whisked away to enjoy the comfort and rigidly adhered to standards of equine slaughterhouses in that part of the world. All because he looked like a horse! The irony is that his header went in and they won 1-0!! Now he is being consumed by UK consumers who think that any meat in burgers costing peanuts will contain anything of any nutritional value or indeed any benefit to their health. 8-]
Do you like how i've put some horse racing terminology in there as we are playing Cheltenham and the town is world renowned for it's horse racing? It's clever isn't it? When we played York i put something about Roman and Viking history, when we played Port Vale i eulogised about the wonderful history of the pottery industry in the area, when we played Burton i shamelessly plugged the town's brewing heritage and when we play Accrington i shall do likewise and highlight THEIR particular individual piece of fame, being a complete sh#thole!
Yes siree! There is little doubt that the WIN AGAINST EXETER, THATS THE WIN AGAINST EXETER has given all around Plainmoor a shot in the arm, sort of like a resident evil style antidote jab to stop us all becoming zombies. There is debate whether it will work as quite often our midfield and strikers can be seen wandering about aimlessly and without purpose. I'm not sure what causes them to want to bite people though, ask Luis Suarez. He bit an Eindhoven player! Weirdo. He's still got the t-virus and that is why he dives so much. You can't blame the lad.
The Gulls fly up the M5 ( well, we are league 2 so it will be by road - we're not Arsenal you know! ) and head into Gloucestershire to face a very talented Cheltenham Town side who, under boss Mark Yates have been slowly shaping into one of the more dangerous teams in the league. We don't need to be reminded that they killed our promotion dreams last season when they deservedly beat us over two legs in the play off semi finals. In short, we had run out of gas and they were just simply far superior in all departments. They were beaten by Crewe in the final but have kept much of the squad in preparation for another tilt at promotion.
Cheltenham Town achieved league status for the very first time when they won the conference title in 1999 finishing on 80 points, 4 clear of Kettering in 2nd and since then they have really consolidated and even had a brief stint in league 1. They are sort of a benchmark for how small clubs should be run at this level and the cash from their cup run this season has certainly helped them push for promotion given that they have signed Paul Benson and others recently.
The Robins find themselves in 6th place in league 2 on 45 points, a point behind 3rd place Burton and 10 off leaders Gillingham. If we win our game in hand AND beat them then we will be just 2 points behind them but that is a big 'if'. They have only scored twice in their last 5 games and haven't won since Boxing Day when they beat Wycombe 4-0 at Whaddon Road. So the portents are good, they are in a bit of a lull and we have just emerged from one so we could go up there and nick a win. They have won 8 at home however losing just 2 and they have scored twice as many goals as they have conceded so another 1-0 could be on the cards. If we concede we won't win, that i'm sure of but we could get a draw. I very much doubt this will be a 0-0 though.
In terms of squad, the Robins have a very, very useful one at our level. In goals they have Scott Brown whilst in defence they have the services of former Derby stopper Steven Elliot, Irishman and club captain Alan Bennett, ex Greek and Portuguese born Sido Jombati, Keith Lowe, Billy Jones and Yates has this month brought in 18 year old Man Utd defender Luke McCullough until March.
Their midfield is arguably their strongest area with former bluenose Darren Carter featuring. He scored the winning penalty in the shoot out for Brum v Norwich in the 2002 Championship Play-Off final and is very experienced. He also has 5 goals this season. Also the Robins have the cultured Marlon Pack. When i say 'cultured' i don't mean he loves to collect art deco furniture and likes nothing more than reading the works of Oscar Wilde before bedtime. No. He has excellent delivery, dead ball potency and is a fine player. Ex Brewer Russell Penn is there as is former Barnet playmaker Sam Deering who i was hoping we might sign in the summer.
Jason Taylor has just been signed on a 2 year deal from fattybumbum at Rotherham but the creme de la creme of the Cheltenham midfield is Jermaine McGlashan. An example of what can be achieved with non league journeymen and turning them into real quality. We did it with McPhee to a certain extent
. McGlashan has power, pace and production and we will need to keep him under wraps if we are to get a positive result.In attack they have Scot Darryl Duffy, Welsh born striker Kaid Mohamed who has 6 goals in all comps, top scorer Shaun Harrad who is on loan from Bury. He is their top scorer with 8 goals and they also have Jeff Goulding who is sh*t. In addition to the Robins strikeforce is ex Dagger and Pompey hitman Paul Benson who has signed from Swindon until the end of the season.
Last time out, Cheltenham drew 0-0 at Spotland to gain a point against Rochdale in what was Keith Hill's first game back in charge of the Lancashire club. Apparently the wind played a part. The part of what exactly? Dr Faustus perhaps? Or the part where players blame the elements for being sh*t?
Robins squad v Rochdale:
1. Scott Brown (gk)
2. Keith Lowe
3. Billy Jones
4. Steven Elliot
5. Sido Jombati
6. Marlon Pack
7. Sam Deering
8. Jermaine McGlashan
9. Russell Penn
10. Shaun Harrad
11. Kaid Mohamed
SUBS: Conor Roberts (gk) UNUSED, Alan Bennett UNUSED, Luke McCullough UNUSED, Jason Taylor ( on for McGlashan on 78 mins ), Joe Hanks UNUSED, Darryl Duffy ( on for Deering on 67 mins ), Jeff Goulding ( on for Harrad on 86 mins ).
MATCH OFFICIALS: The man with the stick in the middle for this one is Mr CARL BERRY. I'd much rather have Jerry the Berry or Den Perry but i've got Carl Berry. His optically challenged assistants are Mr DAVE BUSHELL and MR ANDY HENDLEY with the totally pointless and irrelevant 4th official being Mr SIMON KNAPP. He may as well take one as he is unlikely to be called upon other than holding up the additional time board. I can do that - giz a job!
Birmingham and Forest fans shut your eyes now...........you've got the devil incarnate. You've got Darren Deadman. Sleep well ahahahaoooooheeeeoooohaaaaaaaa!!!! :devil:
TRAVEL CLUB: Come on you lot, stop fannying around and get your Devonshire backsides on the big yellow fun bus. It's the height of sophistication, it's the epitome of luxury and it's the envy of league 2 for it's sheer value and entertainment. Barnet fans may disagree though as they have almost their entire coach as legroom when they go away and also Accrington fans may have something to say as their team coach not only has ample legroom but also has the added sophistication of a driver who is actually employed AND is using his income to hatch a plan resulting in his eventual departure from the depths of despair. He's thinking of moving to Oldham though so not much improvement there.
It's just £23 for adults, bite his f*cking hand off peoples! What can you get for that nowadays? A quarter of a night out, half a parking fine ( so long as you don't contest and pay immediately ), 73 cigarettes, a house in Hull? It's peanuts ladies and gentlemen and i implore you to join the growing band of big yellow fun bus-sers and hop on. Shake of your inhibitions, have wank beforehand if you feel the need, wash thoroughly and step on board this yellow love coach for some yellow lovin'.
